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Nothing gets me in the mood more than tight pants, butt slaps, and dirty tackles (oh, and seven-layer dip). I’m talking about football… for the most part. Heckling is an art, and when done right can bring an opposing player to his knees (or into the stands to beat the crap out of you). The fight song is great, but it’s time to get personal, and mama’s feeling mouthy.

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The Bleacher Bible, $9.95, at Barnes and Noble
This will teach you the do’s and don’t’s of heckling. For instance, do point out an opposing player’s inability to catch a ball due to his height/weight/incarceration. Don’t  insult his mother (unless you think it will make a difference). 3055 S. Glenstone Ave., 417-885-0026,
barnesandnoble.com