Mr. Foodie goes south of the border

Check out Foodie's Cinco De Mayo tips, including an online-only taco recipe.

Dear Mr. Foodie, Cinco de Mayo approaches. Since Americans have appropriated this Mexican holiday as a drinkie-fest, I was thinking of having some friends over for some Coronas. What food to serve?

Follow my tips for tasty (not very Mexican, postmodern American) tacos:

• Use large flour tortillas warmed in the oven or on the grill.
• Substitute chopped cilantro and good pitted black olives from Greece or Peru for plain lettuce and canned olives.
• Add sliced avocado to your tacos.
• Red onion, not yellow.
• Ground beef or ground turkey works for filling. Make as spicy as you like (use cumin, red pepper flakes, chili powder)… or buy a taco spice packet at the grocery. Brown the meat filling with some pre-minced garlic from the jar (you can buy this at Price Cutter, etc.), then spice at the end.
• Add one chopped-up canned chipotle to your meat filling during cooking. More chipotle = more daring.
• Sharp cheddar cheese is best.
• Squeeze a lime wedge over each taco just before serving.
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Mr. Foodie’s Postmodern American Delicious Taco Recipe

Here is the taco recipe I promised in the print edition. These tacos are vaguely Mexican at best, as they were created by a Taney County native (moi). That said, they’re delish.

How did I come up with it? Once in midwinter, the lettuce in my northside supermarket didn’t look so good. I decided to substitute cilantro and use better olives than the ones I grew up eating with tacos (little sliced black canned ones, which I don't like much except on submarine sandwiches, sorry mom). You could substitute fake meat soy crumbles or turkey burger for a lean yet. It serves 4ish, depending on your gusto, and pairs deliciously with a Corona, Rolling Rock or a lighter white like a Riesling (the spicier the food, the sweeter and lighter the wine). Last time I had it, though, I had water.

Ingredients:
1 bunch cilantro*, chopped roughly (mince the stems up finely after rough-chopping the leaves, or discard stems)
1 pound ground beef, very lean
1 avocado, seeded and sliced
1 jar Peruvian or red olives, halved (I’ve found Peruvians at Latino Market (1661 E. St Louis St., 417-831-4227), or just get good Greek/black olives that have already been pitted)
1 red onion, quartered, then sliced thinly with chef’s knife
2 to 3 tablespoons minced jar-preserved garlic from the supermarket
1 taco meat spice packet OR…
1 tablespoon cumin (at least)
½ tablespoon chili powder or hot paprika (at least)
red pepper flakes to taste (I use about 3 shakes of the jar)
1 to 2 canned chipotle peppers, chopped up finely (optional. Freeze the chipotles immediately after you open the can, unless you cook a lot of chipotle-flavored food.)
1 tablespoon dried basil
½ tablespoon dried sage
1 tablespoon olive oil
3 (ripe!) Roma tomatoes, chopped
Fat-free sour cream
2 cups sharp cheddar cheese, finely grated (buy a pre-shredded bag)
1 Anaheim pepper, finely minced (an optional… and very mild… pepper)
Lime wedges
tortillas

To prepare:

1. In a large skillet on medium heat, brown the ground beef in the olive oil with the garlic and the spices and herbs, plus the chipotle. As the beef cooks into crumbles, do vegetable prep. Watch the beef and regulate heat accordingly.
2. Arrange the condiments and vegetables in bowls or on a large platter to serve with spoons and tongs.
3. Place some tortillas in the oven to warm. A quick warm at 400ºF (2-3 minutes) will suffice.

To assemble a taco:

1. Place the cheese on a warm tortilla, followed by the warm beef. This helps melt the cheese a bit.
2. Add plenty of cilantro, a couple slices of avocado and onion and olive and tomato.
3. Squeeze a lime wedge over the open-faced taco.
4. Top with a smidge of sour cream and sprinkled Anaheim peppers (They’re relatively mild).
5. Fold and attempt to eat by hand (it's messy—I suggest dining with large white cloth napkins that you can wash using bleach later on.)

*CILANTRO ALERT: Some people cannot stand cilantro. They’re reputed to have a genetic mutation that makes the herb (also called “coriander”) taste like soap. In that case, subsitute with a head of finely chopped red-leaf or Boston lettuce.